Saturday, April 10, 2010

What should define you as a person

Sometime I just want to close my eyes and just run. Runaway from life, drama, tears, fears, heartache, money woes, love, future, just everything.

I just feel so incomplete and not real. Then I keep thinking to myself...should a career really define who I am? I keep telling myself yes.

I dislike where I work, the people at times can drive me crazy. I am overworked and underpaid and its not something I want to do. I keep placing a vision in my head of where I want to be heading with my life, but sometimes its so hard to believe that vision will come to surface.

I am noticing too that because I am unhappy with my work situation it is reflecting in my everyday life scenarios. I hate going out and being social, I just want to be alone, I take things way to seriously, I dwell over the small things, I feel pinned down like I don't have enough time to do anything I want in my life.

I keep thinking to myself, "Well you are 26 and you are now reflecting on your life, and what you truly want?" Is that what it is a mere self reflection on what I want to be true in my life. I want the success, the car, the apartment/ house, to be on my own again.

I am trying to be patient and wait for my season to come and show up. I know its slowly approaching, but this tease is slowly becoming a headache for me that I want to end.

I have to just keep staying positive and focused and faking it till I make it. People see such wonder and awe in me and see I am doing some amazing things. I have to get to that point where I see it too. Its just hard.

And I keep asking myself what should define you as a person?

Latia

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